My Youngest – A Year On

Facebook Post 10th February 2017 at 23:36hrs

 

Exactly 12 months ago my waters had just been broken and I had my first contraction.

Less than 4 hours later I was being rushed into surgery for an emergency section under general anasthetic as a certain little monkey was trying to come out brow-presentation and he became bradycardic and he was officially delivered at 3.25am.

I went into that induced sleep absolutely convinced that when I woke they would give me the awful news that my much wanted new addition to our family had left me and I slipped into the darkness already grieving.

When I awoke I refused to believe the nurses that my gorgeous boy was well and in his Daddy’s arms where he had been for a couple of hours until they brought him to me.

My beautiful, funny, energetic, cheeky, loving, smiley, bundle of perfection looked over at me and my heart melted immediately.

It still scares me now how the darkness of perinatal depression crept up so rapidly on me in the week prior to his birth and I still feel let down by the people who were supposed to be there to help me but every day, every night he wakes, I look at him and remember that I thought he had gone and I am grounded and in love all over again.

My wonderful Francis.

 

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